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Couples assessments, compared: how the main options work, and how to choose

The best-known couples assessments differ mainly in who runs them and what they measure. Prepare/Enrich and SYMBIS are taken through a trained facilitator, and the Gottman Relationship Checkup through a therapist. The Gottman Assessment and Values Bridge for Couples can be taken by a couple on their own. Choose the one that fits the conversation you want to have, and who you'd like to be in the room for it.

By The Becoming You Labs TeamClinically reviewed by Elisabeth Schneider4 min read

A couple smiling with their foreheads together

How they compare

  • Prepare/Enrich: How you take it: Each partner, with a login from your facilitator. Facilitator or therapist: Required: a facilitator sets you up and debriefs results. Time, per the publisher: About 30 minutes per person. Who it is for: Dating, engaged, and married couples.
  • SYMBIS: How you take it: Through a Certified SYMBIS Facilitator. Facilitator or therapist: Required. Time, per the publisher: About 30 minutes. Who it is for: Engaged and married couples, "faith-based or not".
  • Gottman Relationship Checkup: How you take it: Online, separately, by invitation from a clinician. Facilitator or therapist: Required: "designed to be used with a therapist". Time, per the publisher: About an hour. Who it is for: Couples already working with a therapist.
  • Gottman Assessment: How you take it: Online, alone or with your partner. Facilitator or therapist: Not described as required. Time, per the publisher: About 20 minutes. Who it is for: Couples who want a self-assessment.
  • Values Bridge for Couples: How you take it: Each partner takes The Values Bridge™ assessment online, plus a short intake survey. Facilitator or therapist: Not required; can be incorporated into sessions with a therapist or coach. Time, per the publisher: Under 15 minutes per person for the assessment, plus the intake survey. Who it is for: Couples at any stage, thriving,struggling, or curious.

Prepare/Enrich

Prepare/Enrich describes itself as "the most researched couple relationship assessment in the world." A facilitator sets you up, sees your results, and debriefs them with you, and the publisher recommends a feedback structure of four to eight sessions. It has versions for dating, engaged, and married couples. It fits couples who want structured premarital or marriage counseling with a trained guide. Source: Prepare/Enrich FAQ

SYMBIS

SYMBIS (Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts) is for engaged and married couples, and the company states that any couple can take it, "faith-based or not," with a Certified SYMBIS Facilitator. It takes about 30 minutes and produces a personalized 15-page report, including a section on second marriages and blended families. It fits couples who want a facilitator-led conversation before or during marriage. Source: SYMBIS FAQ

The Gottman Relationship Checkup and the Gottman Assessment

The Gottman Institute offers two tools for couples. The Relationship Checkup is "designed to be used with a therapist": A clinician invites you, each partner answers separately and confidentially, and it takes about an hour. Your therapist interprets the scores, and each partner gets a separate relationship report. The Gottman Assessment is a self-assessment you can take alone or as a couple in about 20 minutes. It covers key relationship health indicators like conflict management, trust, and commitment. Source: Relationship Checkup · Source: Gottman Assessment

Values Bridge for Couples

Values Bridge for Couples measures something different: what each of you wants most from life, and how fully each of you is living it. You and your partner take The Values Bridge™ assessment, which ranks sixteen values, and fill out a short intake survey about your season of life. You complete both parts separately. What comes out is one report for the two of you. It shows how much your values overlap, each partner's Authentic Life Score, and which of 15 couple archetypes describes you right now, followed by exercises and the conversations to start first. No facilitator is needed, but it can work alongside a therapist or coach if you want; therapist sessions are separate. It is designed by couples therapists and psychologists

How to choose

  • You want structured premarital or marriage counseling: Prepare/Enrich or SYMBIS, through a facilitator or counselor trained in that tool.
  • You are already working with a couples therapist: Ask whether they use the Gottman Relationship Checkup.
  • You want a quick look at relationship habits on your own: the Gottman Assessment.
  • You want to understand what each of you wants from life, and how each of you is doing: Values Bridge for Couples.

These tools are not either-or. The facilitator-led tools and the Gottman tools focus on day-to-day relationship issues like communication and conflict. Values Bridge for Couples focuses on what each partner wants from life and how to reach it from where they currently are. Many couples will learn something from more than one.

For more on why values matter, read Values in a relationship and Can a relationship work with different values?

See where your values meet

Sources

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